We sit here I’m not the good time You were promised I can feel your disappointment radiating You want to keep repeating The same things because you want them To sink in My seemingly thick, thick skull I’m not being difficult Well, maybe just a little I want to do this on my own I… Continue reading
Things have been hard recently. I’m following the Engineer around the house, demanding more hugs and randomly bursting into tears. Part of it is that I feel like I’m invisible. I’m standing in a room with everyone but they can’t see me because I’m four steps to the left of reality or I’m just a… Continue reading March of the Pig
I whisper your name to the fierce wind and my tears fall like leaves scattered into a whirlwind…I hope to the sky where I imagine your atoms are dispersed. You are a part of everything but then again I always thought you were.
My thoughts are in the clouds but the clouds are at my feet misty and clinging too far to comfortably touch just to step on and squash down I keep looking up and ahead for the sun but it’s nowhere to be found and I wonder how long until the fog clears…
My hands wrapped around the steaming mug As the tears begin to pour I try to use my voice But I don’t know what it’s for
Me: I just get really anxious when you’re gone. That’s all. The Engineer: But I’ve travelled the whole time we’ve been together. Me: I know and I used to move all the furniture in front of the doors when you left. At least I don’t do that now. TE: You also lived by yourself for… Continue reading
The Engineer: You could knit all day, couldn’t you? Me: Yeah. Especially right now, I’ve got a lot of anxiety. It’s either knit or break all the dishes. He raises an eyebrow. Me: I mean, you don’t have times when you just want to smash all the dishes? TE: No…and don’t do that Me: Oh,… Continue reading